Oysters

I love oysters. Jonathan Swift tells us that it was a bold man that first ate an oyster; I couldn't agree more, and I'm glad that man ate that oyster.

Oysters are exotic and humble at the same time. They're plentiful here in Southern Maryland, you don't even really have to go out to get them. If you know a waterman,(and who around here doesn't), you've got oysters. Take them home and just sit on the back porch shucking and slurping those beauties off the shell. Add beer and you have a feast. Take those same oysters and set them on a pretty silver platter filled with crushed ice; voila!; you are all of a sudden one of the classiest people around.

I prefer my oysters raw, never with cocktail sauce, maybe a little Tabasco or a little red wine vinegar. And definitely champagne.( I am on a huge champagne kick right now, I feel a champers post is in the works). I will eat them fried, but they have to be fried just right. Oysters Bienville and oysters Rockefeller, yes and yes. I will try to bake oysters with anything, I'm creative like that. I make a mean oyster stuffing.

If you've never eaten an oyster, you have not lived. You should try it, you might love it

The Server Myth

It's not all bad being a server. If you do it right, it's actually a viable occupation. Since I've moved back East, I've come across quite a few people who have kind of turned their noses up at my occupation. Even a few of my friends that wait tables as well aren't so excited to tell people what they do. I don't quite understand why it's ok to poo-poo my job; it's insulting to me.

"What do you do?".

"I wait tables."

"Oh".

Pretty soon the next thing out of my mouth will be that I make just as much, if not more, than they do. And I'm not stuck at a desk. In the Chicago area, having a good serving/bartending gig was completely acceptable.

There are downsides to being a server, but is there any job that doesn't have downsides? If you answered yes, you are lying. Here are my answers to other peoples barbs about my job.

"You work such long hours"

Yes, I might have back to back 14 hour shifts on the weekend, but during the week I maybe work 6 hours a night. If I'm over 40 hours, it's not by much. Granted, I work 7 days a week, but I'm a sucker, and gave my 2 days off to the crabhouse. That's ok, it's fun there,(sometimes): )

"You always work weekends"

At this point, if I had a Saturday off, I wouldn't know what to do with myself. Probably because all of my friends are working. While the rest of the world is off, I'm working, and while the rest of the world is working, I'm off. What this means: while you're stuck in Saturday traffic going to the mall, standing in line forever at the post office, grocery, whatever, I'm sailing through MY errands during the week. You know why? Because you suckers are at work.

"You have to deal with a-holes"

If you've ever said this to a server, you're probably one of the a-holes. In general, people don't dine at restaurants just to be jerks. They want to eat. We feed them. If someone is a bit of a jag, oh well, it's what makes my job highly interesting. People who ask questions or who want things a particular way aren't a-holes, they are consumers who are paying for something, the least we can do is give it to them,(within reason). If you've dabbled in "waitressing" and thought that people who asked for things or dared to want to be served in a timely, courteous manner were a-holes, then you, my friend, are in fact the a-hole.

Waiting tables is an interesting job. You meet all kinds of interesting people. You're not stuck behind a desk. You eat. Believe it or not, you're always learning something. You're making GOOD money. The next time someone insults my job, I'll be sure to post my retort. For now, I've gotta go to work ; ) Ciao!

Sundays

I hate working Sundays. Not because I'm overly religious and need to get to church. Not because it would be a nice day to spend with my family and friends. I just hate. Working. Sundays.

This is why.

1. I have to get there too frickin early. I work all week, and of course Saturday is usually our busiest night. By the time you've cleaned up, checked out, whatever, it's well after midnight when we're walking out the door. I live an hour away, so I head straight home, since I have to be back in the morning. Sometimes the drive is great for winding down, but after a busy night, I still can't always get to sleep right away when I get home. If I'm lucky, I can sneak in about 5 hours of sleep, but I'm usually not that lucky. Then I have to get up early and drag my tired ass back to work a 13 hour day. Fun. Since I've been with this restaurant since day 1, I'm pulling rank and strongly suggesting that some of these newer servers can get their rears in there Sunday morning and open the place. Then I can come in later and complain that everything has been done wrong.

2. The B team works on Sundays. Major, MAJOR irritant. The B team consists of newer servers who are still trying to figure everything out. They make mistakes on the computer, whether it's ringing stuff in, closing checks wrong, or anything else imaginable that can be done wrong on a computer in a restaurant. This is fine, mistakes happen, but since Sundays are littered with new servers, it happens more than once. And it slows things down. There is nothing worse than trying to find an open computer on a busy night, and at any given moment one is being completely hogged by a newbie and a manager trying to fix a mistake on a check. The discussion on how a server error can back up a kitchen will be saved for a later post.

It takes more than just waiting on your tables properly to make the night go smooth. There are a ton of little extra things that need to be done. Like stocking. Glassware and silverware doesn't magically appear polished on the shelves. Our particular restaurant doesn't have a gnome that brews the coffee when you've taken the last bit. Servers do this. Newer servers are just trying to keep up with their tables, they often neglect to help with these little things. The gnomes and fairies that restock and polish the glassware and silverware and brew the coffee and in general re-fill things that have been emptied, are the more experienced staff that realize that you need to make the time to do all of this. Now, there are quite a few servers that have been there since day one who also don't help to re-stock during the shift. They just plain suck, and, they also work on Sundays.

3. Weird people go out on Sundays. This is a fact. These people aren't mean, they can be quite nice, but they are definitely "off". The saying actually goes: there is no such thing as a stupid question EXCEPT on Sundays. These are the people who think the beefsteak tomato is some sort of steak, that the mozzarella is fried, and ask you what comes with the steak after you've told them that nothing comes with the steak. They aren't your savvy diners. Most of your white zinfandel people go out to eat on a Sunday.

On the flip side, you get your HBO Dagos who know EVERYTHING about Italian food. They say "calamaht", and "prozhoot" and ask if the veal parmigiana is a real parmigiana. They complain because we don't have spaghetti; probably because they were looking forward to complaining about the sauce. "Eh. It's ok." Go away HBO Dagos! Go terrorize the servers at Olive Garden, they probably deserve it. And by the way, it's proh-SHOOT-oh. You jag-off.

I really hate working Sundays.